#i do it for the texture this man does it to. uh. to. probably get mc to beat his ass for it tbh

[cvntroach5000]

HE FUCKING BIT ME???

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

@teapunks did your mum ever threaten to put mustard on your fingernails to stop you biting them? because by my count 6 different adults directly threatened me with that or mentioned it in a "in my day, they would do this so youre lucky i havent done that to you".

the direct threats came from my dad, my paternal nan and my maternal great aunt while the guilt-trip-that-always-felt-like-a-threat-to-me came from my paternal aunt, the other classes' year 4 teacher and an english teacher who wasnt even my english teacher, for anyone curious.

you could reblog for a bigger sample size or not who do i look like the freakin queen of england

[fluffyfluffyscarecrow]

Scarecrow, Two Face, Penguin, Mad Hatter, and Mr. Freeze with a Partner who Sleeps With A Plush of Them

Inspired by the Scarecrow and Two Face plushies I sewed.

Scarecrow

You had spent days hand-sewing this plush doll of Jonathan Crane, and though it wasn't perfect, you had put a lot of love into it.

The doll appeared to stare up at you with its button eyes while you held its floppy, huggable body and stroked its soft hair. It was like an exact copy of Jonathan, just smaller. And probably less likely to commit crimes.

Jonathan would be incredibly surprised to see the plush- lots of times when people made artistic interpretations of him they were meant to be terrifying. He had never seen a version of himself this...cuddly. He doesn't mind it, though. In fact, he's quite flattered.

When you tell him about how you cuddle the plush at night he practically melts.

Two Face

You made most of the plush Two Face with soft minky fabric, but decided to add something extra- faux fur on the white side of his hair and dot textured minky for his scars. He was perfect.

The first time you showed it to Harvey, he was speechless. His fingers ran across the soft fabrics you had used to capture him so lovingly, and you might have even seen a tear roll down the unscarred side of his face. Two Face is the one to break the silence, saying "you really want to cuddle me that much?"

When you admit to them you cuddle the plush at night to feel close to them, they immediately wrap you in a massive hug. You hug them back of course, making sure to kiss their scars.

Penguin

Oswald had always been insecure about his appearance, and no matter how much you tried to encourage and support him with words, hugs, everything...it always seemed as if his trauma would make him feel unworthy of you. So you got an idea. You would show him exactly how you saw him, in the form of a cuddly plushie.

You had to modify your pattern quite a bit to make it accurate, but it was worth it. The plush Penguin sat before you with its arms outstretched, just waiting to be held.

You paid extra attention to translating the parts of himself Oswald was insecure about into the plush- intricately sewn hands, a prominent beak-like nose, his cuddly, plump body, and of course his long, soft hair.

You're a bit nervous to show the plush to him as you're not sure how he'll react, so you start kind of awkwardly.

"Uh...I...I really wanted to show you how wonderful you are in my eyes and I...I adore every single part of you, so I made this..."

Oswald doesn't know what to think at first, but he's incredibly touched. He still tries to play it cool, of course.

"I mean, you could always have a life-sized version of me if you want."

Catch him off guard by kissing his nose and wrapping him in a hug.

Mad Hatter

Okay, uh.. You didn't sew this one. You just kinda found a Disney Mad Hatter plushie on Ebay or something and thought it reminded you of Jervis.

(Fun fact, I actually do have this plush and he's very soft!)

Even if you didn't sew it, Jervis freaking loves it. You want to cuddle? With him??? So badly that you got a plushie to hold when he wasn't there to comfort you????

Mr. Freeze

This man is very insecure about how he's unable to cuddle you due to his physical state, so you get an idea.

The plush was honestly kind of hard to make, with all the intricate details of his suit, but it was absolutely worth it. You even added a voice box inside so you could hear his sweet German accent whenever you wanted.

Also you added a small tuft of fluffy fabric for his hair, (ik BTAS doesn't have that but HQTAS does and I freaking love it so it's going here!)

He absolutely cries when you show it to him.

You wrap your arms around him when he does, it stings a bit but it's worth it to see him smile.

For Christmas that year you make him a Nora plushie, with magnets in her hands so she can hold hands with your Mr. Freeze plush.

You better believe he cuddles his Nora plush every day. It's not even close to having his wife back of course, but it does relieve some of the pain to get to hold her again.

[starkidsonnets]

edward nashton general headcanons

| contains : poor self image, disordered eating, sh if you squint

| note : misc. and disorganized edward hcs. probably ooc !!!!!! uh oh !!!!!!

⋆ he has athsma and needs a puffer. also needs it for his anxiety and panic attacks because obv it gets really hard / painful to breathe

⋆ short sleeve shirts make him wildly uncomfortable. he feels so exposed and he also just hates how his arms look

⋆ isnt too fond of how his body looks in general. it's not something he really thinks about, though, not unless he sees a really attractive guy on the street or in an ad and is reminded that he's not exactly the standard

⋆ he likes his height, though. read somewhere that "chicks dig tall guys: no lady wants a man under six foot" and he was like fuck yeah

⋆ bought red socks to be "adventurous" since he only owns black, white, and grey pairs

⋆ they turned one of his white button-downs a light pink in the wash

⋆ he won't wear it in public, but he really likes the colour, so he kept it

⋆ finds sped up videos of snails eating cucumber slices very entertaining. it's genuinely brain rot

⋆ will sit on the toilet lid or floor or his bed sopping wet and butt ass naked after a shower staring off into space

⋆ not even just cuz he's depressed it just feels nice

⋆ does not like tomatoes. it's the texture that throws him off the most and if he orders a burger and they mess up his order and he has to take them off himself, he'll still have a hard time eating it cuz he can "taste the remnants"

⋆ migraines so bad he gotta lay down and wait for himself to faint

⋆ struggles consistently with irregular eating habits. he can go days without proper sustenance, absorbed in whatever he's doing

⋆ on the other hand, if he gets too emotional he'll binge, eating whatever he can find just to fill the gaping hole inside of him. he always overdoes it, and either goes to bed with a godawful stomach ache or throws up

⋆ def a hair puller. he tries to justify it by telling himself that the pain is grounding, but he sometimes ends up ripping his own hair out entirely by accident. he feels gross whenever it happens

⋆ oral fixation in the sense that everything is going in his mouth. he's a nail biter, he'll chew on his hand/arm (at home), on his pen, on his glasses, on his phone charger, etc...

⋆ mouth breather when he sleeps, which also means he drools. wakes up with a little wet spot on his pillow and he gets grossed out

⋆ he cannot use chopsticks. gets really embarrassed when he has to go back and ask for a fork (save me white boy save me)

⋆ wants to play board games really bad, but has no one to play with

⋆ buys himself a nice little something that he's been saving up for for himself for christmas. every christmas. he uses the holiday as an excuse to indulge in something he wants, instead of need

⋆ wrapped it for himself one year. spent way too long tryna figure out how to wrap it nicely. felt so stupid once it was all wrapped up that he tore it open immediately. hasn't wrapped anything for himself since

⋆ a single peppercorn would put him in a coma i think

ok thats it :)

[ronearoundblindly]

For the dirty A-Z headcanon game can I get an A for Steve Rogers?

From this ask game, and I love you to the end of the line, anon, because this is pretty much THE one I wanted to answer...

A - Alone Time

How does he get off when all by himself?

Does he watch porn?

Is it all in his imagination?

Does he jerk off?

Does he use toys?

In case it wasn't obvious... MINORS DNI (vaguely coded to be gender neutral for the possibility of steve x reader or stucky or whatever your flavor)

Here we go, babes. I know I've written several different versions of Steve in various universes, but this is gonna be more generalized and not involve the very specific background experiences I've written into other things. This is just my good ol' fashioned headcanon of Steve masturbating!

This man takes his time--or at least would prefer to--even when it's just him. He will gently touch/play with himself for a while before grabbing his dick. Grazing his nails over his thighs. Pinching his nipples. I think this dude really has a thing with his throat? Like he thinks about teeth along his neck or being pulled forward by it and, yes, a squeeze or two. Don't flame me, I'm just saying!

He craves foreplay, is what I mean, and I don't think Steve feels fully aroused unless more than just his genitals are involved in the act, ya know?

He watches porn, but only for examples. There's a whole lot in modern pornography that is a huge turn-off for him. Steve uses certain imagery or sounds/sayings that he found in porn and kinda edits them together for his pleasure later--like mentally edits, lord knows, because that man would not get the hang of Final Cut Pro OR iMovie, feel me?--plus that way he can imagine a certain someone's voice actually saying those things to him or doing them to him.

Which brings us to Steve's imagination which is unbelievably vivid and runs rampant. Think about it: he's a strategist. He has to see tons of possible scenarios play out all at once, analyze where that leads and where that leaves him, and then plan to thwart or redirect all that happens into an ideal outcome. Don't tell me that artist does not have an incredible mind's eye.

Then we get to Steve finally touching himself expressly to come.

He's toyed with himself for a while, maybe gotten close but held back, probably enjoyed finding friction not with his fist. For some reason, I thoroughly believe he has a thing for fabrics? This guy enjoys the glide of silk and satin. I bet his sheets are nice and slick so he can thrust against them a little and think of a pretty skirt or a dressy, formal glove.

Actual toys? Like the kind advertised as sex toys? Like the kind he'd have to purchase with money in some capacity? No. I think shy Steve hasn't figured out a way to discreetly (and by that I mean, untraceably) do that. He refuses to use anything online attached to his name--credit card or secondary/digital wallet whatever--to buy something or to tell someone what he would want them to buy for him because then that person would know! He'd keel over from embarrassment right then and there!! ARE YOU INSANE?!?!

No. What Steve will do is get seemingly useful things for innocuous reasons and play dumb blond if anyone ever insinuates it could be a sex toy. That man can and will absolutely lie like a champ to keep those secrets. That man is a super soldier but his muscles still get sore; that's what the massager is for, not his taint, nuh-uh no how. How dare you ask him!

Which brings us to the climax: his climax.

Steve prefers to finish in the shower. He's spent all that time enjoying the feel of his hands or various textures, the dry (but not painful) drag of everything before the slick lubrication of lotion or conditioner creates a welcome high under the spray of water, and then, yes, he can clean himself right off afterward. Highly efficient. Also very effective at training his brain to get off quickly in a shower if necessary.

Strategy, you guys, it's all about strategy.

Thank you for asking!

A/N: Are my answers to these like an audition for the Shameless Hoe Club? Maybe. Or maybe Ro has just lost the ability to filter herself...or care 🤭

[Main Masterlist; Light Masterlist; Ko-Fi]

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

I’M STUCK ON THIS FUCKING PLANET. I’M STUCK ON THIS GODDAMN EARTH.

Tap photo for better quality

That’s right!! I’m talking even more about sinner bodies because I’m CRAZY!!! RAAHHH!! 🤪 SHES SO CRAZY WE CANT TAKE HER ANYWHERE!! 😝 it’s 3 in the morning and I can’t stop thinking about this goddamn TV.

I think Vox is genuinely the most fucked up character in this rewrite currently. Not really morally fucked up, there’s definitely worse people, but physical alterations in hell out of the main cast he definitely has it the worst. In my last post I talked about how Angel formed in hell and I want to go back to this because Vox did not form in hell as a TV or even a robot at all. He got formed on the road after dying in a car crash and was literally just this fucked up clump of wires and metal panels and had gross little robot hands and he had to make everything else himself and wait for his body to adjust to it, so he literally cannot regenerate normally. He didn’t even have a face yet or screen of any kind, just a little camera to see out of. If his screen shatters he needs to get a new one or if his body breaks he needs to get it repaired, thats why he’s able to upgrade his body and stuff.

And like yeah some tech sinners do just form as robots but Vox just is a fucking mess and I think about it all the time and thats why his demon form is all fucked up like that and I think thats partially another reason he hates Alastor’s ideals so much sometimes because hes like “technology bad!” even though he literally is also partially a tech sinner and hes just stupid but like without technological advancements Vox literally would have nothing like they wouldn’t’ve met, Vox would not have a company, etc, etc and thatd probably help a lot of people yeah like the Vees would not fucking exist but ignoring that, just on a personal relationship scale I imagine your “friend” being like “man I really hate the thing that gives you life and allows you to live a somewhat normal existence” hurts a bit.

Technological regeneration is a bit more confusing and hard to explain than biological regeneration since machinery can’t really “heal” in real life. The concept sounds almost bewildering, like you can’t cut a wire and have it slowly heal like skin would, you’d need a whole new wire. But Vox internally, the things that allow him to move and live how he does now, it’s the only part of him that he can heal, and to him, it’s still “defective”.

Vox is disabled mentally and physically; he has Autism, ADHD, and epilepsy, all of which he is unable to be medicated for due to his new body. These are all things that he hates to acknowledge and will become irrationally upset by if they are mentioned to the point he will actively to deny certain aspects of disability. Being a man from the 1900’s-1950’s his views on mental disabilities and mental illnesses are… less than uh.. “acceptable” for today’s standards. He often disregards slurs towards this being called slurs and insists that “They used to just be words” or “It’s a medical diagnosis.” yet still gets incredibly upset when he is ever called a slur that actually could apply to him. In a way he tries to come off as purposely ableist so that he doesn’t have to confront this aspect of himself that he doesn’t understand. His knowledge in technology or sharks or economics aren’t “special interests” to him, they’re just “regular things a man likes”. He can’t process what a hyperfixation is. He doesn’t know that it’s normal for him to be unable to speak on occasion or that certain textures make him severely uncomfortable. These are either seen as weaknesses or “average people things”. Aside from how terribly disabled people were treated back around the 50’s, he views the neurodiverse aspect of his mind as something that only serves to further push him from grasping the feeling of regular humanity again.

For physical disabilities, he doesn’t lie or deny that he has epilepsy, yes he has an intense disdain for mentioning it, but for very few people he is close with he will disclose this information to them privately. There are a very select few people that are aware of this and two of those people are Velvette and Alastor. This post isn’t really about diving into Vox’s epilepsy so I’m keeping this concise because I have another post to put all of that in. Hope you all enjoy the wacky art :)

The binary says “Trust us” for anyone curious

[the-s1lly-corner]

hi! Hooe ur having a good day so far ;)

if its not a big thing to ask, could you do the TADC crew with a s/o who has a really big sweet tooth? Like they dont need to eat, but anytime something slightly sweet is presented they always eat it no matter what? Thank you!

TADC cast x a reader w/ a sweet tooth!

yipee third request of the day! just got 13 more then im all caught up!! thinking about it more i might reopen requests day after tomorrow, if i finish all the current requests today!

CAINE:

congrats! there isnt a better source of sugar in the digital world than from the tooth man himself; bro literally pulled a cake out of thin air youre set for life if you want to eat treats! i like to think he would make a mental note of what sweets are your favorite and for what reason; taste, texture, smell, stuff like that

i personally hc that since caine is an ai he cant really taste, at least not in the same way we can, so bonus idea, imagine describing what things taste like to him, ,i think thats cute

POMNI:

when you told pomni that you had a sweet tooth, she assumed that you had a normal sweet tooth; as in you simply liked having a little treat here and there. imagine her shock when caine promises sweets as a reward for completing an IHA and you end up going full ham trying to secure the reward. maybe its because your sweet tooth is that intense, or maybe you havent had many chances to indulge since entering the digital world... whatever it may be, i think pomni would give you her candies and treats; she seems like a more bitter flavor enjoyer

RAGATHA:

writing her part first because i just got struck with an idea but imagine the two of you baking something together; bonus you keep trying to eat the stuff before its fully done (ex. you keep eating some of the frosting before it can be put on a cupcake or something). she playfully swats your hand when you try to snag more of whatever you're baking together. gives an apologetic look; would the treat not be better when its complete? come on reader, practice patience!

thats another idea for a real world au thing with ragatha, you two running a little baking business; i think that would be cute

JAX:

you guys fist fight over a bag of sour patch kids sorry i dont make the rules. i hc that jax has a huge sweet tooth, especially for sour candies. so uh, if you like sour candies youre going to have to make a stash... but considering jax has keys to some peoples rooms, you might wanna be smart about it... will share his candy with you if youre feeling extra bad one day, though

KINGER:

sweets, a loving partner, and a cozy pillow fort. does it get more comforting than that? okay maybe it can, if you pair a cup of hot coco with your cinnamon roll, but hey! side note, we see kinger sitting at the table at the end of the pilot... with food... so like.. how does he eat? does it just clip through his face? did he only get food to be polite? now i have a few questions... i dont think kinger would be a huge sweet fan; not really craving sugar that often... i think he would be a spice lover, though, this man would love himself a spice cake me thinks

ZOOBLE:

also not a particularly huge sweet fan, but i think similar to jax they would love sour candies. unlike jax, though, they wont go snooping around for your stash, though! probably snags stuff from the common areas if caine has like a communal candy store in the circus, or if not... stares at jax. you WILL hear from them if you leave your candy wrappers around though!

GANGLE:

speaking of candy wrappers, i think gangle would keep them! gives them a use; depending on what kind of material they are or like... if theyre foldable (think like a gum wrapper) she makes little pieces of origami for you! hearts, frogs, flowers, things like that! sometimes gets you some candy so she can get the wrappers. also likes how the crinkling feels n sounds!

[eyesthatroll]

..rice pudding? | jake seresin

pairing: jake "hangman" seresin x fem!reader

warnings: pretty much just fluff, lowercase intended not really edited.

word count: 0.8k

summary: the next morning after you spent the night at jake's apartment for the first time

"i didn't know you could cook?" you say, the smell of pancakes and bacon invading your senses as you padded into the kitchen, still clad in your night clothes.

jake is shirtless, a pair of black nike sweats hanging dangerously low on his hips, the waistband of his calvin klein boxers just barely in view.

he turns to you, the sunlight shining through the window above the kitchen sink, reflecting beautifully against his sleepy eyes and tousled hair.

memories from last night of you tugging on those dirty blonde locks flash through your mind, and you feel your cheeks warm.

"there's a lot you don't know about me, darlin'" he teases, sending a playful wink your way before turning back to the stove.

you take a seat on the middle barstool at the granite island.

it was your first time spending the night at jake's apartment, and to be honest, you had expected to wake up before him and slip out the door, just to avoid any potential awkwardness. of course, you'd shoot him a text saying that you had a great night, and create a fake excuse of why you had to leave so soon. you really did like jake, and you weren't a total asshole to leave without a word.

but to your surprise, you woke up to an empty bed. an empty bed, and the sound of jake singing along to 'so caught up' by the tuskey brothers, downstairs. you’d stayed in bed for a few minutes before getting up, just enjoying the feeling of being enveloped by the intoxicating smell of jake.

though, in hindsight, you should have accounted for the fact that jake is a navy man, and that he probably wakes up early, if not earlier than you, on a regular basis.

the clink of a plate being sat in front of you brings you out of your head.

"what'cha thinkin' about?"

"you." you answer truthfully.

his ears tinge pink, and he lets out a chuckle before speaking. "let's see if there's somethin' on that plate you like."

you look down at the full plate of food. pancakes, eggs, bacon, and.. some sort of rice pudding?

you pick up your fork and warily dip it in the rice whatever it is.

jake laughs. "you've never had grits?"

"no, what is that?"

"you are such a city girl." he teases, shaking his head. "grits are like.. i don't know how to explain it.. like.. corn porridge."

your browns furrowed in confusion.

"what does it taste like?"

"just take a bite and try it, you weirdo."

slowly, you move the fork to your mouth.

the texture is strange at first, but it surprisingly taste good. very good.

jake looks at you with anticipation. "well?"

your lips lift into a grin. "that's really fucking good, jake."

"yeah?"

you go in for another bite. "when i die, bury me in this stuff."

jake laughs, absolutely enamored by your reaction to trying grits for the first time.

"i'm serious, i want this in my casket."

"if i'm still around, i'll do my best to make sure it happens."

the two of you spend the next half hour laughing, eating, feeding off of each others energy.

despite the big ego and slight superiority complex, jake is actually really great, and you could feel yourself falling in love with him in the future.

you had offered to do this dishes, you felt it was only right since jake did the cooking, but he insisted that he would get to them later.

which made you happy, because while you would've done them without complaining, you hated doing the dishes.

"what're your plans for the day?" he asks, opening the front door for you.

"uh, i don't think i have any, maybe some laundry and cleaning?"

jake nods. "well, if you're bored later tonight, a few co-workers and i are gonna go to the bar. you should come, i'd like for you to come-if you want?"

you fought the urge to squeal like a little girl. "yeah, that sounds fun. message me the details?"

"i will."

you go in for a hug, but jake wraps his arms around you and pulls you in for a kiss.

his lips are warm and soft, almost silken against your own, and unlike last night, the kiss is slow, passionate, allowing you to live in the moment and appreciate him and the way he feels.

jake's light stubble tickles against your chin, and you smile into the kiss, breaking apart for a gasp of air. "see you later, jake."

-

a/n;

i like this for now, but i'm sure if i re-read it in the next few days i'll hate it. anyways, any constructive criticism or advice is always welcome, i'm pretty new to writing so any tips you have are greatly appreciated. thanks:)

[five-rivers]

Sleeping Mask

AO3

For @modordracena @artichokebean @ventisettestars

.

The thing about created objects is that they have intentions.  A book is meant to be read.  A bed is meant to be slept in.  A knife is made to cut.  A door is meant to open.  

This, of course, extends even to objects not created by mankind.  A bird's nest.  A fox's den.  These things have meaning, purpose.  

This extends also to ghosts.  Perhaps, with regard to ghosts, it is even accentuated.  Imbued with the unlife of ectoplasm, an object with intention might also find itself with a measure of will.  

Danny knew this both experimentally and instinctively.  It wasn't only dead meat and vegetable matter that rose in the Fenton household, and Danny wasn't half ghost for nothing.  

The mask would have been suspicious even if it didn't remind Danny strongly of one of his enemies.  This mask wasn't exactly the same as Nocturne's, the features were rounder, softer, more delicate and generic, but there was enough similarity there for Danny to be on guard.  The color, the shape, the texture, the dark arcs that lead from the brow to the tip of the nose, the horns that cupped the sides and served as a place to tie on the long, wide, black ribbons…  All of them called back to Nocturne.  

Things like this were made for a reason.  Somehow, Danny doubted that reason was to decorate a pawnshop window.  

He made sure the lid on the thermos was tightly pressed down before going in.  The last thing he needed was for the ghost he had chased here to cause problems on top of everything else.

The pawnshop smelled musty and old.  A thick layer of dust lay on most surfaces, interrupted here and there by finger marks, handprints, and oddly shaped patches that were either clear or at least had a little less dust.  The only fully living creature in the store was the bored-looking college-age man manning the desk.  

There weren’t even any flies, as far as Danny could tell.

Creepy.  

Danny approached the desk.  “Hi,” he said.  

“No, we don’t have public restrooms,” said the man in a practiced tone.  “We’re not discriminating, they don’t meet the city’s requirement for them to be public because they aren’t wheelchair accessible.  File your complaints with the city.”

“Uh,” said Danny, who hadn’t even heard of that ordinance.  “No.  I was wondering where the mask in the window came from?”

“Hm?  I dunno.  Storage?  We hold onto stuff for a while before we sell it.”

Danny kept his comments about how unhelpful that was to himself.  “How much is it?”

“Mm,” said the man.  “Fifty.”

Danny rummaged in his pockets.  “I’ve got thirty and a candy bar.”  He placed the offerings on the counter.  “It’s full size,” he added, temptingly.

“I can see that.  I’m not supposed to barter.”

“If it makes you feel better,” said Danny.  “It’s probably haunted.”

“Wow.  That’s probably the first time I’ve ever heard that.  About anything.  Ever.”

“No, really,” said Danny.  “My parents are Jack and Maddie Fenton.  Here, you see this?”  He flashed the thermos readout at the man, hoping that he’d never seen one before.  “It says that there’s something haunted here.”

The man looked less skeptical.  

“I can show you my school ID if you’d like,” offered Danny.  “But I could call them if you don’t believe me.”

“Ugh.  Fine, whatever.  I’m not paid enough to deal with any of that.”  The man snatched the money and candy off the counter.  "Knock yourself out."

Danny nodded and tried not to feel too bad about the disappearance of his allowance.  He had a nefarious plot to stop.  Or something.  He took the mask from the window display and turned back to the counter.  

"Do you need to scan it or–?"

"Does it look like it has a barcode?  Just get out."

Danny didn't need to be told twice.  Which left him standing in the middle of the street with a cursed (?) mask. 

What the heck was he going to do with this now?  He frowned at the sculpted face, which was looking less and less like Nocturne the longer he looked at it.  It was too… young, he decided.  Sleeping an innocent kind of sleep.  

He could always hide it somewhere at home, but he had a feeling that would come back to bite him.  He could… give it back to Nocturne, maybe.  There was a certain kind of fairy-tale logic there that appealed to him.  On the other hand, Nocturne was a massive jerk with a habit of magically roofie-ing people, so Danny was, understandably, leery of going anywhere near him.  

He tilted the mask from side to side.  He’d thought that the whole closed eyes look was an illusion, like how mascot eyes were actually see-through, but he was beginning to think they weren’t.  Which meant that this mask had to be decorative… or maybe a death mask.  An unsettlingly large number of cultures had those.  Flying through a community in the Zone where those death masks had literally become the ghosts’ faces was always creepy.  

If it wasn’t meant to be worn, why have the ties?  

He flipped it over and looked at the back.  The darkness inside twinkled with stars.  Then it pulsed and lunged towards Danny’s face.  

.

Being an Ancient was wonderful, in many respects.  Power, riches, luxury, admiration.  Worship, even, and a smooth road both ahead and behind.  Oh, there were wrinkles here and there.  Dictators to overthrow, tests to be given, havoc to wreak.  But wasn’t it better that way?  Wasn’t life sweeter with a little salt?

Not that Nocturne would know about life.  

There was, however, one particular difficulty Nocturne could do without.  One problem that all of the Ancients had to deal with separately.  A weakness.  Anything and anyone so powerful had to have one.  For the Ancients, these were objects, tools, that contained enough of themselves and their power that, in the wrong hands, could be used to either siphon away their power or even control them.  

For Clockwork, it was the Key that wound his internal clock, currently and unfortunately in the hands of the Observants.  For Sojourn, it was the Map, kept safe by the ever-steadfast denizens of the Far Frozen.  For Vortex, it was the Barometer, which he had been bound to against his will.  For Undergrowth, it was the elemental Seed from which he had sprouted.  For Pandora, it was the Box around which so much of her legend had been formed, guarded jealously in her Labyrinth.  Nephthys was the only one of the Ancients who seemed to be an exception, but Nocturne suspected that she merely hid hers better.  

Nocturne’s weakness was the Mask.  A portion of his identity was bound up in it, and if worn by someone who knew his name, it would allow the wearer to take on his identity.  Among other, even less desirable effects.  

He didn’t worry about it terribly much.  He’d hidden it away in the human world, far from where anyone knew about him.  And even if someone did find it, the Mask was twistier, slipperier than the Key.  It had its own fully-formed will, and that will was not one that would easily consent to being used.  A wearer would have his own problems with the Mask, sure enough.  

At least, that had been Nocturne’s attitude about the situation until this very second of this very minute of this very day.  

He had been disastrously wrong about the ‘no one will find it’ portion of his assumption.  He had, further, been incorrect in his unspoken assumption that the Mask would not be changed by its long absence from his presence.  

But the unpleasantness of both those realizations paled in comparison to that of finding himself sharing a body with not one but two other consciousnesses, both familiar to him.  

The Mask giggled and, metaphorically speaking, leaned back, taking its hands off the reins now that the damage was done.  Meanwhile the boy, Phantom, whimpered and whined and futilely tried to pull the Mask off.  

Nocturne’s body, or what passed for his body under the circumstances, dripped and slid from the reverse side of the mask, its starstruck and well-sculpted glory reduced to that of thick, viscous, glittery goo, and constrained to remain on the boy’s skin, bound to the physical body of the Mask as much as boy was.  

Nocturne snarled at the Mask, reminding it of its true master.  In reply, the Mask tied its black ribbon in an elaborate bow on the back of Phantom’s head.  Unnecessary, considering its powers, but an obvious message.  It wasn’t going anywhere unless Nocturne made it.  

Very well, then.  He would.  

Somehow.  

Of course, the first order of business was to deal with Phantom.  

Limited or not, Nocturne still had his powers, and he threw some Phantom’s way.  The child hadn’t even noticed that he was no longer alone in his own head, but his panic certainly increased when he started to fall asleep.  Thankfully, that only lasted a minute before Nocturne had him smothered in mostly-pleasant dreams.  

Although, how long that would last was anyone’s guess.  Phantom had proven capable of both lucid dreaming and blindly finding a way past Nocturne’s powers.  

The Mask, meanwhile, radiated obvious disappointment.  Nocturne would have told it to get over itself, but he didn’t currently have a mouth and Phantom’s was well blocked by the combined forces of the Mask and Nocturne’s current form.  The same went for the rest of Phantom’s facial features.  Nocturne was glad, then, that he did not need eyes to see.  

He picked Phantom up off the pavement - only stumbling a little bit when confronted with the unnatural solidity of the body - and looked around, mentally sneering at the overly mundane and shabby street.  Of all the things he found incomprehensible about Phantom, the fact that he chose to defend such a drab and uninteresting place was certainly the most perplexing.  

Now, to business.  To remove the Mask, Nocturne would need access to his tools.  His tools were in the Ghost Zone, in his lair.  Therefore, his first act must be to access the Ghost Zone.  

Walking through a human city like this…  Nocturne raised one of Phantom’s arms and observed the way the inky, starry blackness of his body clung to the pale limb and wrapped around it.  No.  Nocturne did not believe this was a state that would go unremarked on, even if he could somehow disguise the Mask.  

How annoying.  Of course, he could simply become invisible for the duration of his travel.  It wasn’t as if it was hard.  He followed his thoughts with actions, and quieted Phantom again as he stirred.  

Now.  Where did Phantom lair?  Nocturne had visited it before; traveling through the portal made it difficult to avoid Phantom’s home, such as it was.  But he didn’t know where it was from here.  

The Mask continued to snicker.  

Nocturne would simply have to canvass the city until he came across something he recognized.  

He took off, flying slowly.  He didn’t want to miss anything, and he was unclear regarding what speeds Phantom could comfortably survive.  As much as he disliked the current state of affairs, he didn’t want to be stuck puppeting a corpse.  That would be disgusting and terribly gauche.  

But the use of his powers seemed to agitate Phantom, who strained against the dream Nocturne had so generously constructed for him.  The drain on his limited form tired him quickly, and he landed on the roof of a nearby skyscraper.  He still could not see Phantom’s home.  Had the child been visiting another city?  Had the building been changed somehow?  

His thoughts were interrupted by a blue-white portal forming only a few feet away.  

Ah.  Excellent.  The Mask’s escapades must have troubled time itself.  He turned to greet his old frenemy and fellow Ancient, Clockwork.  

But the being that came through the portal wore an expression Nocturne had never seen on Clockwork’s face in all his years of knowing the other ghost.  Rage, pure, simple, righteous, and barely contained.  

“Release him,” ordered Clockwork, raising his staff threateningly.  

In that moment, Nocturne recalled two very important things.  One, Phantom, despite most ghosts agreeing that he was an insufferable, incorrigible brat, was a favorite of Clockwork, Ancient Master of Time.  Two, Nocturne had taken great pains to conceal the nature of his principle weakness from his fellow Ancients, especially Clockwork, who was already compromised by the loss of his.  

As such, Clockwork and Nocturne were seeing two very different situations.  

And Nocturne could not possibly explain what was really going on to Clockwork via mime.  He leapt off the building.

A blue-white portal opened underneath him, and, for a while, he knew no more.  

.

Danny woke to the sensation of someone running their fingers through his hair.  It wasn’t a feeling he usually liked, but for some reason it felt very good today, and he leaned into it.  It was a strange contrast to how awful the rest of his body felt, especially his mouth, which tasted like something had died in it.

“Ah, Daniel,” said Clockwork, “you’re awake.”

That… was not normal.  He tried to open his eyes and sit up, but found himself unable to do either thing.  His eyes were pressed closed and his arms were pinned down.  He whined, deep in his throat, unable to do much else.  

“Shh,” said Clockwork, “shh.”  To Danny’s vague embarrassment, the reassurance did help.  “Daniel, you’re safe.  I’m taking care of you.  Do you remember what happened?”

Danny shook his head minutely, not wanting to dislodge Clockwork’s hands.

“You’ve been possessed,” explained Clockwork.  “I am attempting to remove the problem.  The medium of possession was a mask.  Do you remember the mask?”

This time, Danny nodded.  

“Good,” said Clockwork.  His hands shifted position, and now he rubbed the skin behind Danny’s ears.    “That’s good.  I know this must be stressful for you.  At the moment, I have you restrained because the beings possessing you have been trying to escape.”

Danny shuddered.  Beings?  Trying to escape?  He didn’t want to think about what these beings might want with him and his body.  Thank goodness Clockwork had found him.  

“But it’s alright,” continued Clockwork.  “I believe the measures I have taken will prevent them from exercising control over you, for the time being.  Unfortunately, the mask…”  He trailed off, running his finger around the rim of what had to be the mask.  Danny twitched at the odd sensation.  

“We may need to let them retake control to fully banish them, however,” warned Clockwork.  “But, for now, I thought a rest would be more beneficial.  Would you agree?”

Danny nodded again.  For all that he had been asleep, a break sounded like a good idea.  Especially if moving forward meant letting someone else control his body.

“Very good,” said Clockwork, hands returning to the top of Danny’s head.  

Somehow, it felt even better this time, and his core purred, low, shaky, and not quite catlike.  It was a recent development, his core doing that, and this was the first time it didn’t startle him.  

Overhead, Clockwork chuckled.  “Just relax, Daniel,” he said.  

Daniel did.  

.

Clockwork, Nocturne realized, didn’t just have some loose affection for Phantom.  He adored him.  Perhaps even loved him.  Certainly, he was possessive over him, using Phantom’s indisposition as a bonding opportunity, encouraging and engendering a helpless trust.  

Nocturne could respect that, if grudgingly.

Slowly, Phantom sank back into sleep.  Of course he did.  Immobile, eyes closed, relaxed… It would be more surprising if he didn’t.  

Nocturne’s control was abruptly switched with Phantom’s.  

“If you harm him,” said Clockwork, pleasantly.  “I will destroy you.”

Nocturne had no good way to respond, so he didn’t.  

“I will give you a writing utensil.  You will use it to tell me exactly how to remove Daniel from your influences.  Nod if you understand.”

Nocturne, not seeing what else to do, nodded.  

“Good.”  Clockwork freed one of Phantom’s limbs and put a pencil into it.  “Write.”

Let me return to my lair and I shall remove Phantom myself.

“Unacceptable.”  

Rarely had Nocturne seen Clockwork so blunt.  However.

I see no reason to cooperate with you, then.  Eventually, you must release me, for the sake of the boy if nothing else.  

A nasty, thin smile raised the corners of Clockwork’s mouth.  “Is that so?  Will you still feel that way when I tell you that I can imprison both of you within Daniel’s psyche indefinitely?  Perhaps I would not be able to remove you, but you would have no control.  Daniel would not be pleased with that scenario, but he would adapt.  I myself would not be opposed to Daniel residing in my lair on a semi-permanent basis.  So.  Think carefully.”

If Nocturne had a face at the moment, he would have scowled.  

Very well, he wrote, this is what you will need to do.

.

Danny woke up slowly, his eyes fluttering open but not really registering what they were seeing for several minutes.  Then he realized he was seeing and sat up.  Tried to sit up.  He was being held quite firmly in Clockwork’s arms.  

Clockwork smiled down at him.  “How are you feeling?” Clockwork asked.  

“Better,” croaked Danny.  “You saved me.  I thought you couldn’t do that.”

“Not usually,” said Clockwork.  “But when another Ancient has interfered, I have slightly more wherewithal to act.”  He lifted Danny’s chin with his fingers and tilted his head from side to side.  “I was afraid of that.”

“Afraid of what?”

“That particular variety of control occasionally leaves traces,” said Clockwork.  “Think of it as being somewhat similar to exposure to radiation.  Even when the source of it is gone, the effects linger.”

“What did it change?” asked Danny.  

Clockwork smiled and released Danny’s chin.  “Nothing you need to worry about terribly much.  You may have a bit of glitter in your skin from now on.”

Danny made a face.  “Being possessed by… Nocturne?”

“It was Nocturne, yes.”

“It gave me the glitter plague?”  Danny started rubbing at his face.  

“Hardly a plague,” said Clockwork.  His smile fell away.  “You will let me know if you feel any internal changes, won’t you?”

“Is that something I have to worry about?” asked Danny.

“Hm,” said Clockwork, putting the tips of his fingers on Danny’s chest, right over his core.  It started to purr.  Loudly.  “Perhaps.”

“That doesn’t count.  Does it?”

“Not particularly,” said Clockwork, wrapping his arms around Danny and forcing him to lie back down.  

“I should probably go home… It was getting towards the end of the day.”

“I’ll make sure you get home on time, whenever you want to go.”

Danny sighed.  “Okay,” he said, snuggling closer.  

“You’ll have sweet dreams from now on.”

“Huh?”

“Consider it rent from your erstwhile roommates.”  

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Character voice

Thanks @elsie-writes here, @willtheweaver here, @mk-writes-stuff here and here, and @illarian-rambling here!

Rules: rewrite the given line in your characters' voices

Got long, under the cut

“Are you okay?”

Lexi: "Omigosh are you okay? What happened???" [Probably panicking herself]

Maddie: *squints, tilts head* "What's wrong with you?" (Genuine worry)

Ash: *tries to read them telepathically* "You're upset. Why?"

Gwen: "Hey, are you feeling alright?"

Robbie: *clears throat* "You good dude? Been worried about you."

Akash: "Are you okay? Been worried, man."

Jedi: "Are you feeling alright?"

Carmen: *pretends she doesn't care, even when she does* "What happened?!"

“I overslept!”

Lexi: "WHAT?! What time is it?? Oh no oh no oh no I overslept my alarm! How is that possible?! Now I'm gonna be late oh no --"

Maddie: "Hm? It's [time]? Hm. Overslept I guess."

Ash: "Wow. I was more tired than I thought."

Gwen: "Oh, no, I overslept!! Guess I have to go to bed earlier or set more alarms next time."

Robbie: "What time is it?! Huh. Guess I needed the rest."

Akash: "There's no way I overslept--guess I didn't set my alarm. *Checks* I did?! Oh no, what are they going to think?!"

Jedi: "I overslept? Oh, dear, this never happens... I rarely sleep as is."

Carmen: "Did someone turn off my alarm? Change it?? There's no way I forgot to set it or slept through it. I don't do that. I don't need the sleep. I made sure I got my schedule working to get the maximum amount of work done. And now, I won't be able to do everything today." (This may continue)

“No, I don't want to eat that [insert food]!”

Lexi: "No, thank you. I'd rather not eat that. I ate too much already, and am full. Also not the hugest fan of it--it isn't your cooking."

Maddie: "I don't like that food. The texture is all wrong."

Ash: "I don't want to eat this--I don't care for it."

Gwen: "Sorry, not that hungry for it. Thank you for offering, though."

Robbie: "Nah. Not in the mood. Thanks, though."

Akash: "I, uh, hate to disappoint you, but I don't like this food. Nothing to do with you or your cooking abilities, it's all me."

Jedi: "Thank you for considering me when offering this, but I am afraid I am not fond of this particular dish."

Carmen: "Ugh, it's disgusting, I'm not eating it."

"That is the ugliest thing I have ever seen someone wear."

Lexi: "Oh... Um, here's the thing: I think we can do better. With the outfit. It's, like, cute and all in a... Unique way. Grotesque maybe. It's the color, I think. We can fix it though! I'll help."

Maddie: "What are you wearing? Are you going to the town in that old Dr. Seuss movie? Or like a Star Trek vacation spot?" *Grins at joke*

Ash: "Why would you wear that? It doesn't really look good."

Gwen: "Oh wow. Um. Sorry, I--your outfit. It's... Interesting. Haven't really seen anything like it."

Robbie: "Oh my GOD! Sorry. Your outfit just took me by surprise. It's...dude, I can't -- it's awful. For your sake, please go change?"

Akash: "Um..." *runs hand through hair* "Look, buddy, I love you, but *grimaces* I think you can do better. Frankly, it's not good. It's...bad? For you. How about I help you pick out something that's more...you?"

Jedi: (silent for several moments) "That is certainly a very interesting choice of fashion. I have certainly not seen anything quite like it, that's for certain."

Carmen: "What in the world made you get into that - it's hideous. Never seen anything worse in fact."

Bonus for this one, because I have a couple specific fashion oriented characters I wanted to react to this--

Rose: *several seconds of panicked crisis* "Okay, we can make this work. Let's spruce up this outfit."

Alex: "Oh honey...darling. Babe. Sweetie. Treasure. Sweetheart. Sunshine. Baby. I'm running out of synonyms. We need to help your look. It's not that good."

Sam: "...this is weird for me, I usually have something to say here. Well, uh, that outfit isn't working for you. Sorry. Don't want to hurt your feelings. But I think your feelings might be more hurt by others. You're glad you're with me. I'll help you."

Niri: *several seconds of contemplating what to say, if anything, he can't talk, he has an excuse, but oh no they're expecting a response, any longer and he will be rude!!!* (hesitant signing): "I don't want to be rude, but I...don't like it. Sorry. Do you want me to help you? I'm good with fashion."

"I hope you stub your toe."

Lexi: "Y'know what? I wouldn't care if you stubbed your toe." (She thinks this is an insult)

Maddie: "I really hope you stub your toe. Cause that hurts. A lot. You've done it before, right? It's bad."

Ash: "Leave me alone and go stub your toe."

Gwen: "You're such a rude person - I hope you run into something and stub your pinky toe. Maybe that will teach you." (Akash: Gwen, babe, how would that teach them? Gwen: I don't know, it sounded better in my head.)

Robbie: "You wanna know what I think about you, Jason? You're a pompous prick bus stop. And the next time you turn a corner, I hope you slam your tiny toe right out of the joint. God, that's painful. And maybe you can get the nail caught on something too. And I hope someone wearing shoes steps on your bare toes as well. And I also hope--" *Akash probably pulls him away*

Akash: *gets as close as possible* "Why don't you go stub your toe or something. I hear that it hurts."

Jedi: "If you were to stub your toe, I will not make a promise to not enjoy it."

Carmen: "I cannot describe how much I want you to STUB YOUR TOE RIGHT NOW!"

Woo, that was a lot!

Tagging @foyle-writes-things @drchenquill @monstrouswrites @mysticstarlightduck @talesofsorrowandofruin @sleepyowlwrites @sleepywriter00 @sarandipitywrites @theeccentricraven @leahnardo-da-veggie + anyone else!

Y'all's sentence is, "Is anyone going to drink this?"

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

[catchyhuh]

Sometimes what people wear as pajamas is a weird indicator of personality so... What’s your opinion on their pajamas?

it took less than a second for me to go “how do pjs indicate personaliOhhh wait yeah that does make sense” as I realized I was folding up multiple adult size cartoon character onesies for my own pajama drawer. let’s get into it BUT UH DISCLAIMER i mostly talk about patterns in canon i’ve noticed with just… tiny personal thoughts in here. less headcanons more breakdown. NOW let’s get into it

lupin:

two modes-- soft, fuzzy button up set, or just his underwear. somewhat depending on weather, DEFINITELY depending on mood. i mean you don't wanna get COLD and he got those nice purple heart pajamas with an actual, legal purchase, so it'd be stupid to waste them ALL the time!

there could be a joke here about how he’d probably just sleep naked if the gang weren’t constantly groaning in annoyance, throwing pillows at him begging him to put on some damn pants, but the reality is… he can’t really sleep like that. it’s uncomfy :( he tried :) but it’s uncomfy :(

jigen:

you aren't ready for this. or you are. you likely are, given i had to choose between like 3 different pictures i have of him in fits like this

and i’m dead serious. big ass ankle length nightgown with matching cap. no, really. these are his actual pajamas. they’re comfy to him. i can’t fathom why, maybe the fabric is just equal parts breathable and warm, maybe he did this once for the bit and realized it was the best sleep he ever had, WHATEVER, these are his pajamas, and no amount of teasing by now will stop him from changing into these before going to bed

i have to respect them for committing to this bit, because you think, oh, he’s the coolest. he wouldn’t have lame pajamas. no he does. very lame. hilariously so. arose such a clatter type shit. nighty night scrooge

fujiko:

now, she would LIKE to say big, fluffy, fancy nightgown… but the texture feels bad scrubbing against your skin all night, so she usually just opts for a simpler nightgown. or, like lupin, just her underwear. obvious fanservice aside she’s clearly comfy bundled up like that so you show em how its done fujiko

no matter how cold it gets, she can never really sleep in pajama pants. shorts, maybe, but anything that reaches past her knees feels restrictive, hence why she normally just goes for the nightgown. she doesn’t even kick in her sleep idk why it’s such a big deal!

goemon:

i had to look through a bunch of stuff because i was like. wtf. what DOES he wear to bed. he can’t just be wearing his usual clothes all day and night, it would be uncomfortable. so i’ve come to the conclusion that these virtually identical clothes here are just made of a softer material, designated as goemon’s jammies

or he just. sleeps in his underwear. it really is comfsorry the mental image of the camera panning across three beds where they’re sleeping in their underwear vs jigen still rocking the victorian fit is killing me a bit

zenigata:

have you noticed he sleeps with his hat on more than jigen does. isn’t that fucked. jigen has a special sleeping hat but the alleged NON-hat-obsessed guy is the one sleeping in it. due to his… hectic routine, he never really has a default type of pjs. either he just sleeps in what he was already wearing (c’mon, man) or he’s packed like, some pajama pants, or (take another shot because this series loves this gag) just hits the hay in the heart print boxers. jigen really is a scientific outlier.

USUALLY if he’s bothering to actually change, it’s just the undershirt he’s already got on and some comfy pants, the kind you can get at like walmart for five bucks, so if he’s forgotten to bring them it’s no biggie. damn anon was right this IS a personality indicator!

BONUS YATA!:

as we have oft discussed, yata is a man we have all met at one point in our lives. so, yata has the basic boring man pajamas. t-shirt that’s too big for him but he forgot to return it, and seasonal pajama pants. the pants always seem to mismatch the season, he wore the snowflake ones during summer, and now he’s wearing the halloween ones in winter?

the shirt itself is also mundanely mysterious. nobody can really place the logo on it, and he doesn’t really remember where he got it from either. it doesn’t bother him too much until it’s pointed out to him

[dukeofriven]

So I haven't watched Spy Kids for probably 20 years? It came out in 2001, I never saw in theatres, but my stepbrother had it on VHS. I remember watching it several times when my step-mum and father first started dating but never after they moved into a house together, which I think cannot have been any later than 2003. The podcast How Did This Get Made just got me to watch 2004's Sleepover staring Spy Kids' Alex Vega, and it had me going 'man, I should rewatch Spy Kids, a film I used to love—hell I should watch all the Spy Kids movies because I've only ever seen the first and Robert Rodriguez is a director whose work I want to dive into' and since its 2023, with a little bit of effort I can easily do that. (Also, I always thought, based on a vague knowledge of their similar poster design, that Spy Kids 3D and The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl were the same movie, but apparently not! Also, Sharkboy et al. had a 2021 sequel? That was popular? And is getting its own sequel? Will have to investigate.) Thoughts on the opening ten minutes of my Spy Kids rewatch:

This production logo is so ugly it causes me physical pain. I hate this boy with his Kate Moss arms (Miraculous Ladybug arms, for you youngsters out there), his ugly beanie, and unbearable smirk.

Also, the telecine weave on the production logos is very noticeable, they're bouncing all over the place and it got me idly musing as to when more modern image stabilization techniques simply took that away. Not that we really noticed in 2001 because even with auto-tracking, gate-weave and other playback artifacts were just accepted as a given on your eight hundred pound convex CRT TV with 480 Ps of resolution that output enough radiation to kill grandma with a Jeopardy marathon. Do young people know about VHS tracking, auto or otherwise? Does the above paragraph make any sense to them at all? Do they know the pleasures of laying your hand on a still-warm television screen and having your whole body shiver as the static discharge runs through your unresistant flesh? Kids today with their big pants and their blue-tooth hula-hoops and their fancy PSPs just can't understand.

The opening shot of the movie is so under-exposed (or, more likely, over-exposed and then over-corrected in post) that Rodiguez's 'written and directed' credit is unreadable. You can see its blur to the right of the red 'FILM' there. It's so bad I thought there was something wrong with my copy so I... uh... found a new copy with a larger file size and it turns out that, nope, it actually just looks like that. Even in fancy 1080p this is just a terrible ærial shot. There's some fantastic shots and cuts in this film so to open with such a stinker is bizarre. Was it bad coverage that day, only one good shot in the can, did somebody fuck-up the film in the lab? I am curious.

Carla Gugino is so cute in this movie it's criminal. Not to be a lesbian but oh my god oh my fucking god. 12 year-old me was all about Carmen but adult me just wants 90 straight minutes of Carla Gugino in casualwear wandering around her lovely home smiling coyly. I would buy a BluRay player to own that movie on BluRay. I'd not picked-up that she played the mom on The Haunting of Hill House because she had long styled hair instead of this absolutely flawless textured pixie cut. 10/10, no notes.

I would like to spend an hour talking about the incredible tilework in that bathroom and nothing but the incredible tilework in that bathroom. I will update you if the film has any further shots of the incredible tilework in that bathroom but I fear it does not. As as an aside, kind of furious that this film was not more influential in the field of home decor. Two decades of effing shiplap and cold grey suburban blandness—what if we'd given up on bloated cookie cutter micro-mcmansion shitboxes and instead gone all-in on brightly coloured Andalusian rough plaster and stonework? What if we all had great tilework in our bathrooms, like the kitchen sink in Howl's Moving Castle?

You know what I mean, you depraved tile nerds.

I don't want you to think Antonio Banderas is not also a total smokeshow in this movie. Because boy howdy. He's a goddamn hunk.

There's a four-second long shot of Banderas flicking this ring box along the coping of the Eiffel Tower balustrade, and all I can think of how hard it was to get to get that box to stay in a straight line, how completely frictionless the box must be (did he shellac it?), and if his marriage prospects would have been ruined had it—in all rational likelihood—gone flying off the railing and smashed into the Champs de Mars.

You know you're in for a rollicking good time when the helicopter perfectly slices-off the stone heads of the two statues, but it's the padre giving the benediction while attack choppers go roaring over head that gives you chills.

A particular shout-out to this lovely unnamed bridesmaid on the left here who not only takes 'putting a parachute on the bride' in stride but looks gleeful and fabulous doing it. Where's her movie?

In 2001 we really thought computers were going to be cool and fun instead of machines that sold our personal lives to corporations and gave children crippling anxiety disorders.

Carla Gugino has a track built into the floor so that her vanity-computer chair can slide backwards across the room so she can have face-to-face chats with her husband. From this we learn two things: 1) she does this so often she's automated it for maximum efficiency, and 2) Banderos, in an ordinary desk chair, never attempts (or knows better than to attempt?) the reverse. To be continued?

[opossumloverr]

Could you do a headcannon with the Rise Boys with a Seal Yokai reader? I wonder how each would react to it?

✪TURTLE BROS X SEAL YOKAI READER✪

Summary:

The Mad Dogs reaction to a Seal Yokai reader!

Warning(s):

None! Fluff

A/N:

FIRST ASK OF THE SEASON EVERYBODY YEEHAWW, I love seals so much they're so cute, if only it wasn't illegal to own them 😓 (Gender-neutral reader!)

《RAPH》

You're so god damn CUTE

He definitely watches those cute animals compilations on YouTube, so when he saw you, he is in AWE

He cannot get his eyes off you

Please please PLEASE let him cuddle with you, PLEASE that's all he wants

I don't know if seals actually do this in real life but, he'll gladly watch you balance things on your nose

OH MY GOSH! And if you can do tricks, popcorn in hand with a beverage to wash it all down, you don't mind putting on a little show for ol'Raphie, right?

"Encore!" Raph squealed as he started rapidly clapping his hands together, "That was amazing [NAME]!"

"Raph all I did was balance a ball on my nose for 10 seconds"

"And those were the best 10 seconds of my life"

He loves anything that you do

Praises you anytime he gets, just look at you! you deserve it!

I live laugh love this giant man

《LEO》

He thinks you're so silly

A silly little goober

He watches those seal stimboards on TikTok unironically 💀

He will 'boop' your nose, you can't avoid it, it's a cannon event

And if you do that little thing that seals do where they retract their whole head into their neck when he does it, you just dug yourself a grave out of embarrassment cause he will NOT stop bringing that up

"Leo, for the last time shut up!" You yelled at the red-eared slider that was currently getting on your last nerve,

"Aw, cmon! you can't deny it, you looked adorable!" He replied, "I swear you'll be the first yokai to ever kill someone with their cuteness"

Teases you and calls you every cringey name in the book

Y'know how baby seals are called 'pups' yeah, he will call you pup on a daily basis (Leo at this point leave, I'm holding the door open for you)

Likes making you mad or flustered just so he can see your reaction ♡

《DONNIE》

You're adorable, hope you know that

Gives you lots of pats with his robot-arms ♡

Will probably research a lot about your species and what they like so he can accommodate them

Seals are actually pretty smart, so uh take that as you will

Likes to lay down on you sometimes while he rants about his day or some project he's working on, not his fault you feel like a cushion

Likes to watch your tail move, not in a weird way its just, fascinating, the way it moves so smoothly is so satisfying

"Donnie? Don-tron? Earth to Bootyyyshaker9000?" You've noticed how he wasn't paying any attention to anything you've been saying for the past 5 minutes, you looked at his face and followed his eyes to where/what he was looking at, oh! It was your tail, you lifted your tail up to wave it in front of his face, that seemed to snap him out of it,

"Oh! my apologies, carry on, [NAME]" He said sheepishly, you just hummed and continued

He also likes the texture of it and will sometimes graze his fingers on your tail

《MIKEY》

HUGS HUGS HUGS!

He just wants to pet you all over

I feel like Mikey is a HUGE animal lover so if you let him pet you, he's over the moon

Plays with your fins sometimes

Likes to squish your face together, he can't help it! you're too cute!

Since seals do eat small marine life, he will cook you a bunch of seafood (seafood boil)

Likes to stare into your eyes, they're so big and shiny, it's kinda hypnotic

Small little giggles leak through your mouth as you stare into Mikey's eyes, not blinking at all, "Mike? You good?" You asked but all you got was a 'hmm' for a response, your eyes subconsciously moved from his,

"Hey hey hey! what are you looking at? bring those cute eyes back on mine!" He pouted, and you laughed,

"Oh, so you like my eyes? how sweet"

"Yep! And I would very much like it if you don't break my gaze, thank you very much!"

I'm so normal about him guys, TRASTYFDTUFYFYUDFIYDIGU

THIS IS WAYY SHORTED THAN HOW I USUALLY WRITE THINGS, SORRY! I'm trying to get my gears going, thank you for the request! Keep them coming guys! but at a reasonable rate pls 🙏🏾

(ALSO LOOK AT HOW CUTEEE AWH)

[natsuki208]

The Hidden Dream (Part 1) 🦋

In which Sebastian traps himself inside of a world where the 10th birthday incident never happened.

~

Hello? Are you awake, sir?

Sebastian’s eyes will not open, either he can’t or he just doesn’t want to. The voice that’s calling for him is grabbing for immediate attention, echoing into his ears and mind, like being poked by a very needy stick. It begins to become too much that the demon’s red eyes springs wide open.

He finds himself sitting up in a king’s bed within a bedroom that feels all too familiar, the texture of the blankets are soft and cleanse as if they’ve recently been washed, and the morning sun shines brightly through the thin curtains on his left. He can slightly hear the quiet flapping of a butterfly’s wing, so gentle and refined that only his stronger sense of hearing can sense it.

The muddled demon looks to his right only to see an old man in a fine butler suit smiling away at him - who else would it be but Tanaka.

“Morning to you, sir.” He greets Sebastian formally with his hand on his chest. “I hope you had a nice sleep.”

Sebastian doesn’t anything yet. He’s oddly feeling a little tired which is unheard of for his species, though it’s probably because he’s been staying with the humans far too long that he’s starting to pick up on their habits. His head feels a little achy, like he’s been hit by a large stone, but at least he can still get out of the bed on his own.

“Let’s say that it was a pretty rough sleep, Tanaka.” Sebastian tiredly states, messing with his black bedhair.

Tanaka lightly chuckles under his breath, does he find it humorous to see Sebastian being such a mess? “Well I’m sure you’ll feel better once you’ve had the breakfast I prepared for you and Master Ciel. He’s been wondering why you were sleeping in.”

That last part catches Sebastian’s attention. He cares less that Tanaka prepared a meal for him and is more confused about the fact that he’s sharing it with the young master. Surely, it does feel strange… but also somehow right.

“Th-Thank you. Tell him I’ll be down there in a few minutes.” He responses clearly, walking towards the cupboard where hangs his chosen outfit for the day. Tanaka bows and leaves him be to change.

He gazes at the outfit hanging on the hooks next to the cupboard, somehow pondering if it’s suppose to be another butler uniform instead of his usual waistcoat and trousers complete with a cravat. Sebastian pushes that thought aside and dresses anyway - he doesn’t want to be Ciel waiting.

-

Carefully and slowly he makes his way down the staircase and into the big dining room, still having his mind on how this morning is putting him off. Almost like being treated like the head of the household is no longer acceptable - but how can that be true? The thought will not leave him alone until his eyes land on the young boy patiently waiting at the edge of the table. Ciel Phantomhive drops what he was doing as soon as he notices Sebastian entering through the door.

“Good morning, father!” The boy stands up from his seat in delight, both of his eyes widen and express full joy just from his presence alone.

A smile of all things can’t make Sebastian feel any worse about his current state of mind; but apparently it did. Well… it’s more of a mixture of adding more confusion and simple joy of seeing his child happy. Ciel heads towards his father in attempt to embrace him but suddenly comes to a halt.

“Uh… sorry. I forgot I’m suppose to tame myself when it comes to physical affection as an upcoming lord.”

He bows his head, in front of him, the demon feels uneasy but appreciates his formal manners.

“Don’t be, Ciel. It’s okay for you to do so with me, after all you’re still my child.” He assures the boy and comes closer to gently pat his blue hair.

“Really? O-Okay.”

Ciel accepts the affectionate gesture from his father and after it was done, heads back to his seat to finish his breakfast.

Sebastian follows him and turns to his own chair at the end of the table. It appears Tanaka prepared some eggs on toast alongside bacon and porridge for Ciel. Seems to be pretty simple but enjoyable, but a lot more better than any overcooked meals made by… uh… who was he thinking of again?

While eating, he noticed a letter that’s left on a silver platter right next to him - the wax seal is a clear sign that it’s from Queen Victoria herself. Sebastian picks it up with his free hand and stares at it.

“Wonder what this is doing here?” He asks aloud.

”That’s the latest request from the Queen I believe.” Ciel notifies. “I left it there for you for when you wake up.”

“My, that was very thoughtful of you.”

“I… I try to do my best.”

The nervous smile and chuckle the boy gives eases Sebastian a little more; he’s certainly raising his child right if he’s so honest and reflective of a young lord.

“However, do you think you still have time before then to go over another French lesson with me? Like you promised yesterday?” Ciel asks nervously.

Sebastian looks away from the letter and at his child’s pleading face. How can he refuse to those peacock blue eyes of his? Eyes that he adored as a parent for years now.

“Of course I will. I pledge my loyalty to you first, my lord.”

“What? Father, I’m your son. And I’m not much of a lord yet. You said I still have a lot to learn before I can success you.”

Once he realises what he just said, he pauses. He questions to himself - ‘why did I say that? He’s absolutely right, so why?’ He remains silent for a whole minute while Ciel just looks confused. Then he smiles softly.

“Heh. Sorry, I was just teasing with you. You know I like to do that sometimes.” Sebastian returns to patting Ciel’s hair in a friendly matter. This chases Ciel’s confusion out the window and he smiles in return.

“Ha ha. More like everyday, now we should probably finish our breakfast before it gets cold.”

“Y-Yes of course, my child.”

[trash-can-sam]

Random Qi Headcanons

- He cannot cook except for the most basic dishes and some slightly more complicated fish centric dishes. Since his parents were fishermen, his mom forced him to help with dinner sometimes and so he ended up learning a lot of fish dishes but it’s been a while since he’s made any of them.

- Despite it being such a big part of his early diet, he never really liked fish. The taste and texture were just too odd for him.

- He has a secret sweet tooth he’s a bit ashamed of. If you look at his likes, his only consumable he likes not involving tea is a Milk Chestnut, which is a desert item. I feel like aside from tea, he also tends to like sweeter drinks. I also think whenever he does drink coffee, he prefers it sweeter. I just can’t see him taking his coffee black lmao.

- Even tho he does like sweet things, he rarely admits it. I have an idea in my head of someone bringing him those super over flavored sweet iced lattes and every time he goes “:/ I don’t really like sweet things…” but then he drinks the whole thing in like 10 minutes and whenever the person is like “So you don’t want me to bring one next time?” He’s like “Well uh I never said that…”

- I also think it would be cute if the reason why Milk Chestnut is in his likes is bcuz it was a nostalgic thing, like his family always used to make it.

- This isn’t rly a hc since it’s very implied, but this man has a serious problem with compartmentalizing everything. He can take almost any type of stress bcuz he compartmentalizes it, but occasionally it will lead to him just randomly breaking down in silent tears and he has no idea why (I speak from experience..)

- He is aroacespec! He just is to me idk what to say. Not many deep thoughts on this one but he is very aromantic and asexual to me. If I was to put a deeper label on it probably like demiromantic and grayasexual, but sexuality and stuff like that isn’t really a big thing in the MTU (which makes sense like not only is it way in the future but the literal apocalypse happened)

- He has a whole binder of old designs he made up when he was a kid, some he’s made a reality some he hasn’t. He’s a very sentimental person, so it makes sense he would keep things from his past close. He wants to make his young self proud and prove everyone who said he couldn’t do it that he, in fact, can.

- This one is inspired by @/mytimeatlautia, he has a weighted blanket as a sensory aid. I think it would be adorable if he made the design for it himself too. (Imagine a personal quest where you need to make it for him and he won’t say why he needs it idk I just think that’s cute.)

- He names all his plants even though he thinks it’s stupid (he will not admit he names them). I also think that despite having so many plants he doesn’t really like biology that much, like he knows a good bit abt it ofc but I don’t think he’s super interested in it. He just likes having plants, he heard somewhere it’s good for your mental health and was like “So if I get a lot of plants it means I don’t need to spend as much time outdoors” (even though those things don’t really connect my guy is out here trying to be as efficient as possible.)

That’s just a couple. He’s my little guy. I love him vm.

[grimmmviewing]

S1E12: “Last Grimm Standing”—C (Watched 3/11/24)

“Okay. Anything else?”

“Uh, no, just you.”

“Do you want me with green beans or asparagus?”

This episode begins strong, with a flurry of activity in the cold open—first, a posse on horseback which initially made me anticipate some flashback action, but then an old man and his wife are killed at their very modern house by a Wesen, who is himself being hunted by the posse. The concept of a Grimm fight club is pretty interesting, but it just didn’t quite work for me in the end.

In all honesty, I was hoping for human culprits rather than the lion men I got. I ultimately liked how they were costumed and styled to given off leonine vibes even in human form, but I thought it would have been more interesting to get some humans aware of and exploitative toward their Wesen neighbors— Some old bigotry to go with the old-school weapons and ritualistic fighting. The way the combatants are essentially, literally de-human-ized to make them fight, including feeding them the remains of killed fighters, feels like the sort of behavior that would fit with a prejudiced human antagonist, someone who only saw Wesen as beasts and wanted to force them to conform to that image. But I’m backseat writing here!

Adaptationally, “Last Grimm Standing” also doesn’t feel that ambitious, at least as far as I can tell. One subversion is how the lions are not themselves combatants here. Another could be how Monroe pulls the equivalent of a thorn from the hand of the top fighter (who is some sort of reptile), but then pulling the thorn doesn’t do the expected thing of softening the other Wesen’s regard for Monroe when they’re pitted against one another. It’s cool to see Nick fight physically in this one, sans gun, but it’s all pretty straightforward.

The most evocative, upsetting, and, also, interesting thing in the episode is probably the image of a bunch of white men on horseback lassoing and dragging a Black man. Of course, these are all technically Wesen in this universe, but the uncomfortable historical echoes here, along with the contrast of modern and not, obviously feels resonant. This is just another one of those things the show feels not at all equipped to do much with…

In terms of charming bits and goofs that could be considered charming, we’ve got the name “Leo Taymor” for the head Lowen, which I did not catch until quite late in the episode (and groaned when I figured it out). Nick also points out the appropriateness of “Leo” (to Leo himself) just in case anyone in the audience missed out. I found myself wondering if the lowlifes who presumably attend and bet on the fights actually understand Latin, though, or if Leo is just as good as speaking gibberish at them when he announces and commences these bouts. Whatever “wrath” Renard brings down on him in the end sounds an awful lot like a comedy badger, from Ernest Goes to Camp, maybe.

Maybe part of the “problem” is that “Last Grimm Standing” ultimately feels like an episode on its way somewhere else. The plot of the week does take up a sizeable chunk, but the way that the episode spotlights Renard in his own parallel story involving the fights (that he’s apparently kind of in charge of them) is obviously texture and characterization leading somewhere else. This is where we start to run up against my lack of knowledge outside this first season, but the Latin, the John Wickian secret honorable society stuff, Leo referring to Renard as “highness” and “royalty”—The antiquated vibe is a unifying element of the episode (Monroe emphasizes the historical value of the stuff in Aunt Marie’s trailer as well), but it’s also gesturing toward the larger plot, at least what I remember of it.

This is also the vibe with the ending: Renard gets his revenge on Leo for crossing him, leaving the audience with a lot of questions about his whole deal, while Nick is on his way home very late on his anniversary with Juliette, having missed dinner and left her in the dumps. This too is a gesture toward larger/longer plot threads, further putting emphasis on stories to come rather than this one. And that’s fine! I just wish I had felt a little better served by the story of the week to balance things out.